This morning, I cast my eye over the newspapers while in the garage and saw this:
“I bloody knew it!” I shouted. “I always reckoned Nicole Kidman looked a bit weird and plasticky, but people put it down to the botox. But, no, she was built for Tom Cruise by Scientologists in the underground lab they share with the Lizard People!
‘Maverick Scientist’? Wasn’t Maverick Tom Cruise’s call sign in ‘Top Gun’? It all fits! We’re through the looking glass here, people!”
The other customers tried their best not to make eye contact. Then I realised it was two separate stories:
And apparently Texaco no longer require my custom in any of their retail outlets.
And if any scientists read this, while you’re pissing around with “artificial life”, I am still without a jetpack.
Priorities.
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Actually Dave, speaking as a Scientologist Space Camp Supervisor, I can let you have a bit of insider gossip – Nicola Kidman actually has a porcelain vagina. Unfortunately it has a crack in it which upset Tom Cruise because couldn’t make it go ‘ping’ anymore – hence the divorce!
Regards from Hubbard Island
http://www.wired.com/autopia/2010/01/nasa-puffin/
“NASA’s Puffin Is Way Cooler Than a Jetpack”
and there are three models that you can buy:
http://www.jetpackinternational.com/equip.html
You’ve beat me to it again. I really should get up earlier.
She’s *definitely* had work done, tho
@mazzawoo