Don’t ask me how, but I stumbled upon this on Amazon this morning:

Yes! For £29.99, you can have your own lifesize cardboard cut out of Gordon Brown!

But wait! They don’t just want to give you that! They’ll also throw in “a generous 25x20cm gloss finish photograph of former Prime Minister Tony Blair professionally produced and printed on premium, top end crystal archive quality Fujifilm photographic paper.”

It “assembles and folds away for easy storage in seconds” much like the real thing earlier this week.  

“Dave, this is awesome!” I hear you cry. “But what is is suitable for?”

If you believe that this is suitable for any of these situations you A) Hate your friends B) Never want your partner to touch you again C) Hate your kids D) Are a psychopath.

And I never ever want to be invited to one of your parties.

Unsurprisingly, it’s in stock. I’m going to buy it. I’ve already got plans for it.

I’m going to wear the Tony Blair picture as a mask and recreate the lead up to the invasion of Iraq by shouting obscenities at the cardboard Brown.

I await the Cameron/Clegg twin pack. I dread to think what people will do with those.