First, I’d just like to give a big shout out to the person who found their way to the website by googling “Can you join the army when you wet the bed?”.
I hope you found what you were looking for. Good luck and keep chasing that rainbow.
But I’m sure that you’ll understand that I wouldn’t want to have the bunk beneath you in the barracks.
1. Princess Leia – ‘Return of the Jedi’
Oh, come on. Who else did you think it was going to be?
I’m sure there has been many a young man across the globe who has “choked his Jabba” over the thought of Princess Leia in the Gold Bikini ™
In the words of Chandler in ‘Friends’, “It’s when she stopped being a Princess and became a woman.”
Yes, 1983 was a big year for young Dave Turner. All Boy George/Zoltar gender confusion was halted by my watching of “Return of the Jedi”. Girls were officially Great.
In my search for photos for this post, I came across The Greatest Picture Ever and also The Worst Picture Ever.
The Greatest Picture Ever
It’s like they looked into my brain.
Princesses Leia (What is the plural of Princess Leia?). Gold bikinis. Pillow fight. Ladies, I salute every single one of you!
The Worst Picture Ever
I started to quibble about how the hair is all wrong (Leia only wore the Danish Pastries in Episode IV) and then I realised that the hairstyle possibly wasn’t the problem to be concentrating on.
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I once worked in a Star Wars exhibition, and we had a dress up day. I made a Leia costume and did my hair up – white dress and danish pastries. The Edinburgh Star Wars club helped out at the exhibition that day, and one of them was also dressed as Leia – ceremonial dress from the end of New Hope. The two of us were chatting together in a shop, dressed up, when her boyfriend came in, saw us together, and had this weird silent moment. You could literally see what he was thinking when he looked at us. Pretty gross. That set the embarassing and unexpected tone for the rest of the day – you should have heard the things customers said to me. It was the last time I dressed up as Leia. Imagine it would have been 150 x worse for the bikini ladies above.
I love that dog picture.
I’m sorry but knowing about the existence of “The Edinburgh Star Wars Club” makes me happy in ways I can’t possibly explain.
There must be nothing worse than being hit on by a sweaty sci-fi geekboy. The Better Half and I are considering a joint stag/hen night. She has already rejected my suggestion that the girls all dress up as Leia.
My good friends have just had a Hag do (yes, they had it together) and went to a place called GoApe. Basically you go on zip wires and chase each other around the wood. They did not do fancy dress but I’m pretty sure the majority of the men were lusting after a zip wiring Princess Leia regardless of having no stimulation, I hear it’s hard-wired into every males’ collection of synapses. So it goes…
There’s one of them near us. All looks far too energetic. My suggestions are merely limited to heavy drinking.
It’s weird! You should have heard some of the things people said to me. Ugh.
Thes best thing about the Edinburgh Star Wars Club is that it’s a joint Star Wars/Star Trek club, and there weren’t enough of them with Star Wars costumes. We had Klingons and the occasional Starfleet officer walking around beside Luke etc. Made my geek blood boil, but it did look funny.
Apologies for the repetition of ‘you should have heard some of the things people said to me.’ Clearly I was scarred by it.
Ah, there’s a Go Ape near us. All looks far too energetic. My suggestions are limited to venues that are more suited to heavy drinking.
Laura – There’s defo a comedy in there! Not enough Star Wars fans so have to make up the numbers with Trekkies! Sorry – Trekkers! They say drama is conflict!
Although Wilma was robbed you’re right that is the Greatest Picture Ever and is now the reason why I will never leave a party early just in case someone decides to bring out the pillows and the gold bikinis.
How does one approach the subject. Was it just one girl in a gold bikini, someone made a comment and she said “Well, I’ve got some friends. Let me make a couple of phone calls…”
And is it spectacularly Guardian reader of me to refuse to refer to it as “the slave girl outfit” like the rest of the interweb?
I can’t help but notice it looks like a conference room in a Holiday Inn. I’m gonna keep my eyes peeled next time I’m kipping at one of those… I’ll take some photos for you Dave. Although bear in mind it’ll probably be Manchester and there’s bound to be smack involved somehow. There’s nothing like seeing Princess Leia tripping off her tits.
(Then again that’s the desired effect, non?)
Yes, I noticed that. It’s like a company AGM went seriously out of control.
Needless to say, I’m looking for clues in the picture and tidying up my CV to submit.
9am Meet and Greet (with coffee and refreshments)
9:05am Clothes Off for Instant Comparison
9:30am 3 Second Window for people to Leg It
9:31am Pick Your Pillows
9:32am Thwack People Like You’ve Never Thwacked Before
9:33am Company Bosses Sit In Corner and Thwack Oneself Like Never Before
9:35am (This is liable to flux depending on humidity of room eg. if air conditioning is permitted.) All Cheer.
9:40am Repeat without the Meet and Greet; chances are you’ll all know each other very well.
(Everyone shall have code names, they’ll all be Leia to avoid confusion and leaving anyone out.)
Inevitable choice for #1, really, though let’s hear it for a noteworthy omission from the list (and one that would have beaten g-force into the top five)….
Jenny Agutter in Logan’s Run.
I thank you.
Well, I am a man of A Certain Age.
Yes, you’re not the first to mention Ms Agutter, but for me, it’d have to be in “An American Werewolf in London”. Don’t you see some booby in that?
Now I’m going to sound sad but, whatever, jumping off the cliff into water = booby in Logan’s Run.
Ah. I may have to re-visit ‘Logan’s Run’! I must admit to not having watched it for many a year!
A spot on choice for number 1 and also honourable mentions for Jewel Staite. It will be interesting to see if you revise the list after watching Dollhouse. In my mind both Amy Acker and Miracle Laurie steel the show from the obvious leads in terms of overall hotness.
Speaking of which I need to spend some more time looking at the p-Leia fighting picture above.
I shall make time to watch ‘Dollhouse’. Purely for research purposes you understand.
Oh yeah. Amy Acker is beautiful. I haven’t seen Dollhouse, but I had a bit of a thing for her in Angel.
Was she Fred in ‘Angel’? Oh, yes. We likey.
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